im pondering on whether i should post some photos here. im somehow laughin to myself as i look through those pictures. well, i dont mean to rake up the past. but i have pictures of COUPLES which will send people laughin and blushin and the parties involved will probably strangle me alive if i ever do. haha. okay. so i shant. but i'll still mock them whenever i have the chance. haha. as im lookin through all these pictures, taken durin the past four years, i suddenly came to me tht we, as a class, didnt take any class photos together other than those for the yearbooks, which we failed to get. sad. funny how 109 loves takin class pictures together. it suddenly hit me as well, tht ive known the girls, geokho missleow atiq, and the guys, alex kw yd alvin, for four years. no. more than tht. okay. let's just hit it straight. ive never been on good terms with alvin. and suprisingly, i dont know why. tell me someday yea? when we're all old and toothless. it seems just yesterday the four of us were in burger king, settin our resolutions on meetin on the 9th of feb on 2014. i remembered all so clearly. it seemed just yesterday, we were at the carpark, eatin our pizzas? playin with candles? playin catchin. haha. its all so clear. i feel old now. old enough to sip a sip of mayb, pu-er, lookin up into the sky and go, those days. knowin them for four years means knowin people like lun, erdiah, cheryl, and many many more for four years. people whom i said hi and byes in sch. people whom i teased because i simply love them. people whom i gossiped together. lois was sayin tht gossipin is somehow my forte. ha-ha. it's yours too lah! i wont exactly say i was a very nice person in bowen. actually i came to realise tht im not. mayb its because i dont bitch as much in yj. or tht ive no one there to tolerate my tantrums. no one like missleow geokho atiq. let's evaluate on why i love them so much. its simply hard not to. missleow. she has always been the target of all teasings. as much as how people tease her, they love her. its hard not to. she may scream why u piss her off, but she never takes it to her heart. she gives advices tht are fair to everyone. pass judgements which are straightforward and true. she's just like a big sister to me. no. she feels like a mom. i bet she'll kill me after readin this. but she's just tht. she's mom. her shoulders are always the most comfortable one after a long tiring day. u feel fucked up. u feel stressed. just by lyin on her shoulders, it'll all go away. geokho is always the one people bully. everyone bullies her. laugh at the way she acts. the way she dances. the way she sings. but she doesnt mind. limin lah. always bully her. haha. but geokho never minded anything. she lets u bully her. shes never one who bore grudges. not tht i know of. shes always givin this retard grin when i complain about f&n durin theory. and she lets me bite her when f&n lessons are boring. she washes up after every lesson knowing tht i simply hate washin dishes. she brings the cloths and aprons knowin i wont bring them. she waits for bus with me althou her bus is the one tht always come first. atiq. i always argue with her. but nevertheless, she loves me so. mayb not at a point of time. but i believe she does now. which is why i felt guilty ps-ing her for pw on sunday. shes always the smart and crazy one. givin intellectual ideas on things to do. she seems to be mockin at limin at times. but actually, shes scoldin her. tellin her tht tht wont do. she always has her way with things. and i admire her style of doin things. simply because she cant be bothered on how others look at her. she doesnt care. yihui erika stanven changsheng has been the best company to tide through olevel times. they were smart funny crazy wacky and daring. when i say funny, i mean funny. there arent any moment tht u wont laugh when they're not around. yihui never troubles anyone. whenever we're out for meals, she never makes us have to look for other alternatives or change our choice of meals just because she cant take meat. shes smart humble and caring. shes humble. really. for tht, i respect her alot. she never put on airs because her english and chinese are good. she never complains, but yearns to improve her weak subjects. erika the violent one. i have vague but many memories of her pushin us around. thinkin back, i laughin at it. it hurt at tht time. but it was funny. haha. erika was one hardworkin lady. she tries alot to improve her english. her math and sci was good. but never got too arrogant about it. and she spends her money on the right stuff. bein the eldest, she knows she has to. shes really a responsible sister. from wht i see. stanven the complain king. really! he complains about everything. he whines about anything. from the classmates he has to the choice he had to make for posting. but hes who made us laugh all the time. hes jokes are unknowingly stupid but goddamn funny. hilarious. changsheng. many people doesnt like him in the first place. many seem him as weird, sarcastic and sadistic. but he's actually really soft in heart. he doesnt mean to be sarcastic. tht was just bein him. even as close friends now, hes still sarcastic towards us. esp limin. but thts just him. we all know tht he doent mean anything. hes just jokin as a matter of fact. i was looking through the pictures as well. one picture tht i see made me really want to post it here. but my stiff relationship with alvin made me think twice. it was the neoprint tht we took as calavaky. lookin how we all looked like back then makes me wanna laugh. but i guess things arent how it used to be. many things went on durin the four years which made us think twice about talkin to each other, playin with each other, jokin with each other, goin out with each other. i bet each of us has our own reservations. i dont blame anyone tht. we are all growin up(: haha. because of reservations, i didnt dare to talk to alvin at all. wht crap right? i bet people from yj readin would be thinkin, oh please. charmaine cant stand NOT talkin for even 5mins. not talk to someone? nonsense. i guess we all had our moments. if i have a chance, i'll relive the four years again, not bein someone bitchy and all. but more of someone comfortable. mayb a nerd would suit me best. haha. i mean, i guess ive live on impressions of others for mayb not for the past four years. but three? or two? its bad enough. which is why buyin a bag same as ying jian wont matter to me anymore. i like the bag. thts all tht matters. rumours about me and some other guy wont bother me and make me embarrass. so be it. right limin? thts wht uve been tryin to teach me all along. so dont let me havin a same bag as others bother me. i like it. thts all tht matters right? thts why i love my friends in bowen. they made me this. oosh. i hope alvin wont be readin this. i guess i'll be all so embarrass if he does. but once again, i dont care. i feel better sayin all this out. thts all tht matters.

dont laugh. shes my friend. yes. im snapping at you. thts just her being her.
CHARMAINE<3