i feel so cold-blooded. the first thought was never to make her feel better. it was never to pacify here. it was just to make sure i dont have to clean up her vomit or tht my room wont stink. i was selfish. but i dont see it as something wrong. especially where my family is at stake. all the warmth and security are being drained away by her tears. when i see her cough, i hope she chokes. when i see her cry, i hope she goes blind and dumb. i know she's innocent la. but, i feel more innocent. i hope she finds a better place and leave. i really mean better. im not tryin to be sarcastic or wht. but i mean it. it'll make me and everyone else feel better and at ease. whtever it is, im glad i told my mom. includin the part where i see her as a stranger and intruder. and nope mommy, no amount of time will make me accept her as family. and its not only me. all of us. includin u and dad. u know it. i know it.
CHARMAINE<3